Mutated Creatures 'round You Stare

Stuck in the late '80s? Still playing Warhammer 40,000: Rogue Trader while blasting Bolt Thrower's Realm of Chaos - Slaves to Darkness* cassette on your ~35-year-old Pioneer 125-watt receiver/twin-cassette tape deck/turntable/graphic EQ system with 20-inch floor speakers? Need to print some new Unit Record Sheets but you lost your original (that you sacrilegiously tore/cut from your book!**) and the Xeroxes have been copied, recopied, and re-recopied so many times they're almost unreadable?

Your worries are over! 

Here's what you need while you push that yummy, yummy 1,000-point lead army over your far-too-green train mat, around those hills with their flaking railroad flock and exposed bits of white Styrofoam, and act out the agonized screams of the heretics as you grind them into the treads of your homemade cardboard Land Raider:

(Click to download as a PDF.)

*Or as my friend used to call it: playing Whorewhammer while listening to Goat Blower.

**Beware! Inquisitor Obiwan Sherlock Clousseau and his pet ptera-squirrel are coming for you - you have been warned!


  1. Oh how I laughed. People turned to look.

    1. Hahaha! I do love inducing a good public chortle!


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